ACT If You Are Struggling, Feeling Stuck, Or Need An Extra Push.
Are you struggling or feeling stuck during this pandemic, or during the final weeks of 2020? Has the prolonging persistence and intensity of the double pandemic taken a toll on your motivation and mood? One of the things that these pandemics has forced us to do is to take a more reflective look at ourselves and what we have going on in our lives. Some of us are finding that we don’t really like what we see. Others are choosing to ignore what we see. Yet, and still some of us haven’t taken a moment to “look”. Regardless of which camp you’re in, I want to encourage you to A.C.T.
The first thing you can do if you are struggling, feeling stuck, or need an extra push is:
A—Take time to reflect about your life (not anybody else’s), and ASK yourself a few QUESTIONS
What am I grateful for?
What part of my life am I most pleased with?
What area of my life am I hiding or ignoring?
Which area of my life might I need to work on?
What do I want most out of life right now?
What am I doing today that will help me prepare for tomorrow, next week, or next month?
What can I do today that will help me or somebody else in some way in the future?
How can I make the space in which I exist better for everyone, including myself?
Sometimes when it doesn’t look like your experiences are going to change and you’ve been in a seemingly dry or lifeless season for so long, it’s easy to become complacent or lose sight of what our future holds. We go through the motions every day on autopilot not recognizing our lives are changing before our very eyes, but we aren’t changing with it. If you have become complacent and are not doing anything meaningful or of value, start doing something. Take time to honestly answer the preceding questions and reflect on your answers daily. Consider a plan of action to move forward productively.
If you are struggling or feeling stuck during this season in your life, another thing you can do is:
C—CREATE a new narrative and a new normal and be willing to CHANGE. Perhaps you might be in a bit of a funk, feeling tired, unmotivated, or just stuck. What’s keeping you in that place? Consider what you are thinking, saying, or doing during the day. When you wake up in the morning, what are your thoughts? What are you saying to yourself? For example, are you thinking this is going to be an amazing day; something good is going to happen to me today, or are you saying: I can’t do this again today; my life sucks; another day without a job, or I hate my job. You may need to change your thinking. Tell yourself something different, or do something different. Another consideration is: what are you listening to, watching, or eating all day? Are you listening to, watching, or eating junk all day? Are you mindlessly scrolling through social media comparing your life to other people’s highlights? Are you taking any medications that may be impacting your mood or motivation? Do those medications need to be adjusted? All the preceding can impact your motivation and how you feel. So, what changes might you need to make?
Chances are, we are not going “back to the way things were”. If you stay stuck, waiting, or trying to continue with your life as it was before, and refuse to make changes, you probably will become frustrated and exhausted to no avail. Instead, consider, how can my life be a little better than it was before? What changes do I now have the opportunity to make that I probably needed to make years ago anyway? What connections can I make, or relationships can I build that I didn’t see a need for previously, but may now be beneficial? What small steps can I take to get started? Who can I get to help me? In creating this new narrative, talk yourself through the changes that you want to make, not out of the changes that you want to make. Again, we must consistently tell ourselves something different.
Finally, if you are struggling or feeling stuck during this season in your life, it is imperative that you:
T— TAKE TIME to rest and reset. For many of us, our days would go a lot better and be a lot more productive if we started with a full tank. I understand there will be times when you don’t get all the sleep you need, or that you have a restless night or a trying day. That shouldn’t be the case every night and every day. How are you contributing to your lack of rest? For me, I have to consistently consider am I doing what I need to be doing or a whole lot of extra stuff? It’s a blessing and a curse to be an over achiever sometimes. And yes, we wear a lot of hats, and we have a lot of responsibilities, but what and who have you prioritized continuously over yourself and your rest?
I want to encourage you to hit the reset button. Our computers have one, our phones have one, and yes, we have one. For me this means walking away from everything for a minute, taking a hot shower, pausing to pray, listening to a song, or reading a scripture. What can you do to hit the reset button? We don’t function at our best when we need to rest and reset. We are easily irritated, angered, and distracted, and we move a lot slower.
So, be intentional and take the time you need to rest and hit the reset button. If you need help with this or if you find it hard to work through things on your own, seek help from a trusted friend, pastor, counselor, or primary care provider. At Intentional Life Consulting, PLLC we can help you as well.
To learn more or work more in depth through some of these points, contact me at info@intentionallifeconsults.com.
